The King of Broadway (Bonus Track)

You're looking at the man Who used to be the king The king of old Broadway The best of everything Was mine to have each day I always had the biggest hits The biggest bathrooms at the Ritz My showgirls had the biggest tits I never was the pits in anyway We believe you Thousands wouldn't We believe you, every word We believe you Thousands couldn't We believe each word we heard I used to be the king (the king) The King of old Broadway My praises they would sing A Ziegfeld so they'd say My shows were always filled with class The best champagnes would fill my glass My lap was filled with gorgeous ass You couldn't call me crass in any way We believe you Thousands wouldn't We believe you, every word We believe you Thousands couldn't We believe each word we heard There was a time when I was young and gay, but straight There was a time when I was bold There was a time when each and every play I touched Would turn to gold (There was a time he wore the finest clothes) I did (His shoes were always new) Now I wear a rented tux That's two weeks overdue (Poor Bialy, what a shmoozer) Rented tux (Poor Bialy, what a shame) Overdue (Poor Bialy, what a loser) Way overdue (Poor Bialy, goodbye fame) Such reviews! How dare they insult me in this manner? How quickly they forget I was a protegé of the great Boris Tomashevsky (Ooh) Yes, yes, I know He taught me everything I know I'll never forget, he turned to me on his deathbed and said Maxella, alle menschen muss zu machen Heim du gegatzen kashen pishen pippikrachen What does that mean? Who knows, I don't speak Yiddish Strangely enough, neither did he But in my heart I knew what he was saying He was saying, when you're down and out And everybody thinks you're finished That's the time to stand up on your two feet and shout Who do you have to fuck to get a break in this stinking town? I used to be the king The king of old Broadway Again I will be king And be on top to stay (on top to stay, hey) There'll be gala opening nights again You'll see my name in lights again I'll go from dark to brights again My spirits high as kites again I'll never suffer slights again I'll taste those sweet delights again No plethora of plights again No blossoming of blights again No frantic fits or frights again Fame is in my sights again I'll take those fancy flights again I'm gonna scale the heights again Bialystock will never drop Bialystock will never stop Bialystock will be on top again (Fame is in his sights again) (He'll take those fancy flights again) (He's gonna scale the heights again) I'll be on top again (hey)